An Uzumaki's Story
by Chillman22
Summary: One-Shot. Naruto had no choice, having no way of getting home, not even summoning, he decided to make a living as a writer, where he ends up making friends with a certain scissor wielding girl, having to deal with a perverted masochistic editor, a dog that loves reading and a red-haired maid who is shy when she sings and tries to kill people, just another day. Up For Adoption.


**After watching "Dog & Scissors" anime episodes, I thought, wouldn't it be funny to have Naruto as a part of the world.**

 **An Uzumaki's Story**

 **Chapter 1**

 **One-Shot Pilot**

 **Shopping District**

 **Ally-Way**

He didn't know how this happened, one moment he was facing his "frenemy" Sasuke Uchiha, trying to stop the annoying emo from leaving the village, but then everything became a bit of a blur, when he began using the fox's cloak, then before anything else him and Sasuke did a "last-attack," since both were suffering from exhaustion, a blinding light happened to them, and that was the last thing he remembered.

Slowly making his way towards the streets, his body tired from the fight, before he could move any more, he trips over, knocking over a couple of trash-cans, causing a clatter, gaining the attention of some people outside the ally-way, just as his consciousness began slipping, where they spotted the young blond by himself, looking like he just been beaten and mugged, causing them to rush him to the hospital.

 **Hospital**

Laying in bed, he couldn't help but think himself lucky, these people don't seem to have any chakra so they use machines to scan people, meaning, to them they couldn't see his chakra, though for some reason he doesn't know why. (But allow me to explain, since the path-ways act like a "cover" for his blood, the scanners couldn't pick up his chakra energy, meaning all they saw was his veins and other important stuff, and because the scanners couldn't "see" the chakra it ignored the pathways completely.(At least that's how I made it out in this story.))

Having no idea why, he just gave it up as a bad joke, " _I'm not into that whole body/doctor-thing anyway, I'll leave that to Tsunade Oba-chan and Sakura-chan, they've got the smarts for it!_ " Nodding his head, he hears the door opening and see's a nurse coming into the room.

The nurse, seeing the patient awake, gave a kind smile, "Well, it's nice to see you up and healthy young man." Not being surprise at his fast healing, since a lot of people seem to just heal in a week or something. (Wink, wink.)

Taking her pen, she began writing a few things down, "Well, young man, can you please tell me your name?"

Being in hospital before, he replied, "My name is Uzumaki Naruto!" While finishing with a big smile, making him look like a fox, making the nurse giggle at how cute he looked.

Once the whole, paperwork was out of the way, along with how he explained he was an orphan living on the streets, with nothing.

Luckily, the hospital sorted him out, along with the cops finding him a place to live, yet (un)fortunately he had to go to school, though thankfully, he began enjoying school, since the teachers actually help him out, unlike those bias teachers, minus Iruka-sensei, weren't much help.

But then he realised he doesn't have much income, that is until he found a seal on the underside of his upper-right arm, turns out that as a prank of his own, Jiraiya, the pervy-sage, placed his complete collection of Icha-Icha into the seal one night, when they were looking for Tsunade.

About to tear them up at the stupid-pervert's joke, Naruto realised, in a way, Jiraiya had just helped him in his income-problem, he'll become a writer as well, he'll write about his adventures, though reluctantly, he'll re-publish the perv's books as a starter, just to get him going AND in begrudging memory of the perv, but if the man found out Naruto was spreading Icha-Icha in a new world, the perv would be more than likely proud of Naruto.

Thankfully, Naruto also started using Jiraiya's name as a pen name, using Kaeru(Toad) as Jiraiya's last name, in memory of the summoning Toads, which he found out he couldn't summon, yet it turned out there was a lot of perverts for Jiraiya's books.

 **Naruto, age 17.**

It took almost 3-4 years for everything to happen, yet it turned out, Naruto enjoys writing, along with "Jiraiya" being a world famous author, it might not be up to par with the 3 great authors, but he wasn't too bothered about all that, as long as he gets the royalty-checks to help him out in now living on this world, he'll be fine.

He changed his attire slightly, now wearing black jeans, an orange skin-tight t-shirt and a pair of thin wrist gauntlets while inside, but when walking about outside, he took to wearing a long black cotton trench coat, with the gauntlets being thin enough to hide inside the sleeves, like his friend suggested him to wear, while threatening him with a pair of scissors to his face, while he held them back with a hidden-blade.

(A.N. The cotton trench coat was styled like Neo's from the matrix reloaded, only up to just above his knees and wears it open.)

But apart from that, there was no problems with his life.

"Oh, Naru-kun~"

Though there was one or two things that cause him problems, taking of his glasses, turns out writing too much hurt his eyes, so he got a pair of glasses to help him out enough.

Rubbing the bridge of his nose, he turns around and see's a certain masochistic editor on her knees, looking up at him with hopeful eyes, she may call his friend Kirihime her mistress, but she is still an amazing editor, the only problem is Suzuna started calling him master, since she now see's both teens as such, with Naruto's eyes "turning" ice-blue in disgust at her, which seems to turn her on even more, while she exclaims ' _That it's like being frozen alive, while her mistress is burning her with her glare,_ ' or something like that.

Especially when she found out about how Naruto went to the "Inn of Blades" and got them to make a dual hidden wrist-blade, wanting him to cut her like Kirihime, since he got the idea from the Assassin's Creed games and thought they were cool,(not to mention protect himself from Kirihime's scissors,) along with thin arm-guards to protect his wrists, but still managed to hide the whole thing in his sleeves.

Anyway, back to the matter at hand, "Yes you disgusting thing, what do you want." Turns out that he took up a little of his friend's personality, when their editor was around, of course considering how the woman is, she creeps Naruto out, with the degrading from him being a "shield" to try and keep her away, but that just seems to set her off even more.

The way he talked to her, caused the woman to start drooling and sit ramrod straight, "Ah, Naru-kun~, I-I was just w-wondering if you've managed to get the n-next issue of "Icha-Icha a Masochist's Dream" ready yet, if not I can surely help you with the i-imagery." She finishes begging, while holding a long rope in her hands, while panting in excitment.

Hearing her ask that, Naruto got up, staring down at the woman with those frozen eyes that she enjoyed seeing, knowing she just asked the wrong thing, or the "right" thing to her, he slowly starts walking towards her, an aura of frozen blue starts to appear around him, with his eyes appearing to be glowing the same frozen blue.

Suzuna started to quiver in excitement, her lips shaking, until.

 **"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!~3"**

Naruto, in his anger at the editor for even asking such a thing, had the woman tied up in bondage-style, spinning around, making the woman feel both pain/pleasure and dizziness, having the editor visiting for so long, Naruto is use to it by now, looking away from the woman, Naruto started crying waterfall-tears, " _I've had to deal with this sort of woman for so long I no longer care about these things, why can't I live a normal life, now that I've unfortunately been forcibly retired as a ninja._ "

Getting over his depression, Naruto clears his throat, "Actually you hanging wench," Causing the woman to moan happily, "I'll have you know, I just wrote a new manuscript," moving to his desk and opening a draw, Naruto shows it to the woman, "There may be a few spelling errors, or something, but I'll leave you to take care of them," Flicking his hidden-blade out, with practised ease, Naruto slices the ropes, along with a bit of skin since she pays more attention that way, "Now then, if you don't fix my work, along with Kiri-chans by the time the day is through, I will start being kind and showing concern for you."

Knowing that'll inspire the editor to move quickly, since she began running towards the exit, she yells back, "Y-Y-Y-YES MASTER, I'LL BE SURE TO GET IT DONE FOR YOU AND MISTRESS RIGHT AWAY, SO PLEASE CONTINUE PUNISHING ME MORE LATER!"

With that, she was gone, his eyes returning to their warm and caring nature, Naruto sighs to himself, "I guess since she enjoys it all, I have no choice but to do that." Looking at the time, he decided, "Hmm, I think I'll go out and grab some snacks for myself and Kiri-chan, ever since the shooting, she seems to have drawn in on herself."

At the time, Naruto wished he was at the cafe with Kirihime to stop the shooter, but before that he went to take a trip to the "Inn of Blades" to get his own blades cleaned and sharpened, by the time he got back, the criminal got away and an innocent Highschooler was shot in the head by the man.

So trying to show his support as her friend, Naruto tries to be there for her after such a thing, yet for some reason, Kirihime now has a dog with her that seems to have an unhealthy reading habit, along with Kirihime seeming to have develop an unhealthy "affection" towards the dog, but he's not gonna open that door, since she is his old school friend, who has the tendency to cut anyone and anything with her scissors.

Once getting his coat on, he begins his walk to the shops, that is until he began hearing singing in the park, seeing a peculiar sight of a maid with a broom singing and seems to be acting out a kind of dance, but what really caught his attention was the red hair she had, yet her singing voice really captivated her, causing him to accidentally step on a twig.

Causing the maid to stop singing and spot Naruto, being who he is, Naruto just smiled, "Wow, your singing is really beautiful and you have really lovely red hair." Causing the maid to blush red, Naruto noticing the blush then says, "Hmm, if you're that shy about singing, maybe you should sing privately and not in a public park."

Though it seems she didn't hear what Naruto said after he complimented her hair, "Y-You saw me didn't you, but I guess I have no choice," Flipping her broom around, "I apologise, but I Moribe Sachi, maid for Lady Himehagi Momiji, will have to give you a quick death with my Zapper Of Corruption!" The end of the broom dropped off, leaving behind a blade turning it into a Naginata.

Naruto was surprised at such a weapon being concealed, before he could comment on such a thing, the now known Sachi dashed towards Naruto, ready to impale him with the blade, before the blade could connect, Naruto flipped his wrists out, his hidden-blades coming out of hiding, using his left blade to perry the maid's weapon away, surprising the woman at such a thing, allowing Naruto the chance to get behind her, placing his right blade at her neck, while flicking his left blade into hiding and grabbing her "broom" and holding it against her.

Keeping his body as close as possible so Sachi doesn't try anything, she couldn't help the blush at feeling Naruto's body pressed against her, managing to look behind her, her eyes found Naruto's, allowing her to see such serious eyes that left her feeling breathless.

Naruto leaned towards her ear, with his breath leaving her in goosebumps, "Now listen, if you didn't want anybody finding out, then maybe singing beautifully _in a public park in the first place..._ " It seems, that Sachi didn't pay attention when Naruto complimented her on her singing, causing the maid to blush bright red, knocking Naruto away by elbowing his chest, she grabbed her broom end, attached it back on, then ran away, leaving a confused Naruto rubbing his chest where she elbowed him, it didn't really hurt but it did cause him some puzzlement.

Getting up, Naruto brushes the dirt off himself, shrugging his shoulders and carries on, "I'll never understand women!?"

 **To Be Continued.**

 **Like I said, I was watching "Dog & Scissors" anime and thought it would be a good idea to get the ball rolling for this idea, I'd like to point out that it doesn't have to be the maid to be with Naruto, it could be whoever the person who adopts the idea, I'll leave it to them, hopefully someone will adopt.**

 **All I ask is that whoever is interested in adopting this idea to tell me when they've posted chapter 1 so I can post an announcement on who's adopted it and the name of the story.**

 **I Do Not Own Naruto Or Dog & Scissors.**


End file.
